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When parents
are making the choice about whether a mother
should return to work after the birth of a baby, it
can be a stressful time. Mothers who have taken maternity
leave, fully intending to return to work, often find
after their baby is born that they don't want to leave
him or her with a childminder or at a nursery.
According to the Women and Equality Unit, one third
of women taking paid maternity leave don't return to
work as they are unable to work suitable hours. A recent
Maternity Rights Study found that 67% of mothers returned
to work within 10-11 months of childbirth, and of those,
over half switched to working part-time.
The pull to stay at home can be great - yet the pull
to return to work can be great too, not the least because
of the financial pressures that many young parents feel.
Staying at home suits some women, while it would cause
others great frustration not to get back to work, at
least for a few hours a week.
Neither option is 'easy'; both choices have their drawbacks.
Circumstances vary from one family to another, and there
is no set 'tick list' that can be brought into effect
while making the decision.
So how is the choice to be made and what factors should
be taken into consideration?
• Try to
decide what is best for all the family
- your partner, your baby or child/ren, and not forgetting
you. Don't be swayed by what other people are doing,
or what other people think.
• Make
some 'For' and 'Against' lists,
one for each member of the family.
• Work out
your finances.
You may really want to stay at home, so you need to
decide whether you can make ends meet. Ask yourself
whether you can do without some of the things that you
previously thought of as necessities.
• Ask yourself
whether you will
feel a great sense of loss if you don't go back to your
job.
• Talk to
other people who
have made the same decision. Find out what's good about
going back, and what's not so good.
• Don't
rush in to the decision,
if you can help it.
• Find out
some facts - such
as types of childcare options; whether you could have
part-time hours; whether you could take time off when
your child is ill; how your career will be affected
if you don't go back immediately.
• Decide
in advance on the
division of labour in the home - including who is going
to get up on those disturbed nights.
• Be prepared
to feel guilty -
whatever your decision! Guilt is an inevitable symptom
of motherhood. Try not to give in to it - once you've
made your choice, try to make it work. And if it isn't
working - you can always change your mind!
For further help
about staying at home with your baby/child,
contact Full
Time Mothers, an
organisation that aims to enhance the status and self
esteem of mothers at home.
Address: PO Box 186, London SW3 5RF.
Email: fulltimemothers@hotmail.com
Website: www.fulltimemothers.org
If your decision
is to return to work,
contact Parents
at Work for further
help on sorting out your work/life balance.
Address: 1-3 Berry Street, London, EC1V 0AA.
Tel: 020 7628 3565.
Email: info@parentsatwork.org.uk
Website: www.parentsatwork.org.uk
The Daycare Trust
can offer advice on childcare issues and help you to
decide what type of childcare might suit your circumstances.
21 St George's Road, London SE1 6ES.
Tel: 020 7840 3350
Email: info@daycaretrust.org.uk
Source: www.themothersunion.org
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